CONNECTING with TEENS

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A letter to DAD
Dear Dad,
It is with great regret and sorrow that I'm writing to you. I had to
elope with my new girlfriend, because I wanted to avoid a scene with
Mum and you.
I've been finding real passion with Stacy, and she is so nice, but I
knew you would not approve of her, because of all her piercings',
tattoos, her tight Motorcycle clothes, and because she is so much
older than I am.
But it's not only the passion, Dad. She's pregnant.
Stacy said that we will be very happy. She owns a trailer in the woods, and has a stack of firewood for the whole winter. We share a dream of having many more children.
Stacy has opened my eyes to the fact that marijuana doesn't, really
hurt anyone. We'll be growing it for ourselves, and trading it with
the other people in the commune, for all the cocaine and
ecstasy we want.
In the meantime, we'll pray that science will find a cure for AIDS, so
Stacy can get better. She sure deserves it!

Don't worry Dad, I'm 15, and I know how to take care of myself.
Someday, I'm sure we'll be back to visit, so you can get to know
your many grandchildren.
Love, your son, Joshua.

P.S. Dad, none of the above is true. I'm over at Jason's house.
I just wanted to remind you that there are worse things in
life than the School report that's on the kitchen table.
 

"Give your children roots and wings. Roots to know where home is, wings to fly away and exercise what’s been taught them" . — Jonas Salk

Don't squash their dreams and desires. Parents often unknowingly belittle their children's dreams and desires.  I'm sure we all remember as children, when our own parents would deflate our ideas by saying "How do you think you are going to do that?"  or "You have to be really smart to become a .....".  Being practical you may like to call it, but practicality does get in the way of dreams and desires.  Look at the great inventors of our time, .........  their dreams were encouraged not thwarted. Treat children with respect When we don't have respect for our children, it is ultimately reflecting the lack of respect we have for ourselves and we certainly won't inspire respect from our kids if they are not receiving respect from us.  Just as in "monkey see, monkey do", they will mirror back to you what they are receiving.  We can very easily give respect and at the same time can stand in our own power to administer boundaries. Protecting yourself from Drama The best way to prevent yourself from reacting to drama is to take a few deep breaths and centre yourself.  When you can learn detachment, it will become your ally in all drama around family relationships.  You will find that when you begin to practice detachment, those old situations where you reacted will in fact fade away.